Good night, sweet squirrel...

(Coming home for Thanksgiving on Monday, I accidentally hit a squirrel while driving and ended his life. Regardless of all the road kill I have observed over the years, this was the first and only time I had contributed to the pavement graveyard. It's still affecting me. Therefore, this is a eulogy to the poor, unfortunate animal I sent off to rodent heaven.)

Dear Mordecai (this is what I named him),

I write this and you are gone. Please understand that it was never my intention to end your time on this plane of existence. Your life and being was just as important as mine and I believe that your stature and lack of understanding of large motor vehicles and the destruction they can cause was neither your fault nor your responsibility. I only wish you had thought better of dashing across Finch Avenue just as my car was proceeding eastward.

I can't say I know why you did this. I like to think that it was the actions of an animal who was at the end of his rope. I like to think that it was an intentional move spurred on by an unhappy life, maybe a tumultuous existence, or perhaps a depressing time of year (the holidays can be rough on us all). At least then I could envision that my unintentional snuffing out of your acorn gathering life was not so much a tragedy but a cure for your sadness. The fluffy tail sometimes does not tell the full story and although the sadness this scenario evokes is still very substantial, I might be able to come to terms with the fact that I might have helped in some small way. If this is the case I guess I can be happy that even though I warned you from the inside of my vehicle: "Fuck off squirrel. Don't do it idiot. Don't...don't...DON"T. AHHH you little fucker!", you still chose me to be your rescuer from the torment of life in the trees.

All this being said Mordecai, I wish you a peaceful, restful afterlife. May the place your little soul has been carried to be free from dogs and other strange and pointless predators. May the nuts flow like wine and the treetops be tall and branchy. May winter never come and summer never leave. And may the opportunity to run up to the side of any road, pause for a second, wait for a car to come along to kill you, run out underneath it's tires, make the driver a murderer, and end up the main ingredient in a redneck's thanksgiving stew, never appear. May your rolling carcass on the road continue the journey up to paradise.

I'm sorry my furry friend. Farewell and Goodbye.

P.S.

My car is now making a fucked up noise and I'm pretty sure it has something to do with your skull bouncing off my undercarriage you little bastard!

Mordecai the idiot
?-2010