Nocturnal Admissions or Conversations with a Sleeping Beauty

My girlfriend is many things. An incredible person. The ying to my yang (any definition of yang is acceptable). A formidable opponent. She is all of those things and much, much more. One of the things she happens to be is the most entertaining person to fall asleep beside. Even when she is unconcious she is still funny and brilliantly endearing. This is the reason that even with eyes closed, she's a star.
For Christmas I bought her a T.V. and because of this purchase, she tends to fall asleep before I do. She drifts away quietly while I remain transfixed by "The Walking Dead" or "Tosh.0". The real show however is when she begins to enlighten me with gems precariously tucked inside her sub-concious. This is when the fun begins and the T.V. mute button is pressed.

The following conversations were transcribed from actual dialogue exchanged during two of these sleepy talks. Please understand, I am completely awake and at some points, kinda fucking with her. For the benefit of the reader, her voice will be in bold and mine in italics.

Conversation 1:

"Jupiter"
"Huh? What"
"Jupiter, baby."
"Jupiter? What about it?"
"It's too hot. Jupiter. Hot."
"Jupiter? But it's so far from the Sun."
"No. Jupiter's hot. The Sun is hot."
"Yes I know the Sun is hot. But Earth is closer. Jupiter would be cold."
"No. Jupiter. You don't know. Jupiter's hot."
"No you're right, I don't know. So Jupiter is hot. So, what does that mean?"
"Jupiter. We can't go there. Too hot."
(pause)
"Say Jupiter again baby."
"Noooooo. Jupiter."

Conversation 2:

"The sand."
"Hmmmmmm?"
"Sand and mosquitos."
"Mosquitos? What about them?"
"And sand."
"What? Like the beach?"
"Yeah. Sand and shells."
"But the-"
"They'll cut our feet."
"The shells will."
"Yeah and mosquitos."
"They'll cut the mosquitos feet too?"
"Mosquitos."
"Well now you're just not making any sense."
"Mosquitos."
"You know what I call them? I call 'em Skeeters."
"Hmmmm. Stupid."
"Do you know where the Skeeters are born?"
"In the sand."
"Under the sand eh? Won't they bite your toes?"
"Noooooo."
"Well where do they live Skeeter Whisperer?"
"Beach Chairs."
"Of course."
"Mmm-hmm."
"They live in the beach chairs do they?"
"In the beach chairs."
"Yeah. That makes more sense."
"Biting mosquitos."

I keep my phone right beside the bed for an alarm just in case I oversleep. Now I have a new quest. To make filmings of this phenomenon. She doesn't read this anyway so I'm somewhat safe.

Stay tuned.