2011...now what?

Happy New Year. Auld Lang Syne. Prospero Ano. Yippee, Huzzah, and accompanying horn-like sounds from those little horn-like things. For some reason, the clock ticking to midnight on Jan 1st, is an annual excuse for bacchanalia. It is a quick moment in time that universally allows people to fill their seemingly hopeless and mundane existence with thoughts of extreme and magical promise that could encompass the next 365 days. Such thoughts could only happen but once a year. Only then, for one second, could we possibly delude ourselves to believe that we are going to do anything really substantially different then a second ago, simply because we are now in the process of physically push-pinning a new kitten calendar in the existing hole on the wall. I'm not trying to be negative but it is a fairly strange and almost assuredly disappointing way to begin a so-called new chapter in one's life. It is such a typical human thing to do, especially nowadays. Let's begin the year by putting as much pressure on ourselves as possible so we can cement the fact that New Year's Eve will officially be the last night we truly enjoy this year. I see it every year. I do it every year. The best party coupled with the hardest hangover. Not only do we wake up feeling like shit, but now we gotta do shit too!

The promise...

...the reality.

Now, I don't, for one instant, begrudge anyone trying to better themselves or do anything positive. I don't think that January 1st, (your year here), is necessarily a stupid or unreasonable time to create certain plans to make such changes. It's just when I hear some of the outlandish expectations people put on themselves for the coming year, I wonder if it's because they feel guilty for having that 17th jager-bomb on Dec 31st, and therefore must be flogged daily with the cat o' nine tails of disappointment. You can do things, great things this year, but don't say: "I'm gonna get a degree, lose 125 pounds, get married, find a new job (that I love), and do a lot of charity work." All of these are outstanding things to want to accomplish, however, let's put it in perspective. If you did somehow manage TWO of these things, you could probably consider it the best year you, or anyone you've ever known might have had. It's great to have aspirations and ambitions, but the more attainable you make them, the better year you will have. I used to do the exact same thing and if by the Ides of March my life wasn't completely turned around, the rest of my year went to shit.

So this New Year's Eve I said "No more!" Well actually, it sounded more like "AAHMM DDRRUNCK!!" but the idea was to not let myself let myself down again. Therefore, I give you my very reachable goals for the new year. 2011, watch your ass!

1. Finish year with at least $201.00 in savings account.

I currently have $200.00 in my savings account. Therefore, with very minimal effort, I can be at least a little better off than I was at the beginning. See how good this is going so far?

2. Lose 1 pound a month.
If I can accomplish this, I will be exactly 12 pounds lighter come December. That would put me exactly where I would like to be. Or, I guess where I should be. Or, I don't know, I just don't want to grunt when I get out of a chair anymore.

3. Watch at least 1 new movie a week.

I was sick recently and I realized after watching 3 Will Smith's and the entire M. Night Shyamalalalalaladingdonglnnnalanan collection (which made me sicker somehow) that there is definitely enough time in a week to spend being entertained by a minimum of 1 film, even though I spent the better part of a week not being entertained by any. Gonna make better choices too.

4. Drink water.

I don't. I should. Why not? S'good, no?

5. Get my passport.

It's been 5 years since my passport expired and I have a girlfriend who wants to go on vacation frequently. Plus, I think you need it just to get into Buffalo now don't you? So, I guess I should get it. And then take her to Buffalo. No, not even Buffalo. Tonawanda! No, not even Tonawanda. North Tonawanda!!! We're comin' Irv!!

6. Holla at the Fam at least once a week.

Everybody's everywhere. But still, regardless of other goings on in our separate lives, we live in an age where a mere acknowledgment of a friend or family member takes seconds and is readily available at any time. Once a week is not too much to do.

7. Read a book every 2 months.

Attainable, enlightening, entertaining, and booky. Couldn't think of another adjective. I should read more.

8. LOOK for a new job.

I'm not gonna put pressure on myself to actually GET a new job The pursuit alone kinda entails that attaining a new job is the idea. Just the mere search at this point will be enough to make my current job just a little more bearable. And who knows? Maybe the search will bear fruit. Maybe literally. Maybe I'll get a job in an orchard. Free apples. Okay, this one's my favourite so far.

9. WRITE!!!

See above.

And finally...

10. Try not to fuck up as much as you did in 2010.

Now this doesn't mean that I spent 2010 fucking up. No more than anyone else. No less either. It just basically means, try not to be any stupider than last year. Always learn from mistakes of yours and others. Just maintain. Don't shoot the moon. Just maintain, idiot. Be better and don't be the things that annoy you in other people. Be smarter, funnier, happier, nicer, more helpful, more focussed, more reliable, more considerate, and a little closer to that person you ultimately want to be. Sounds like a tall order I know, but it's always the smallest gestures and actions that lead to the most progress and growth. Day by day, and thought by thought. That's my 2011. Living in the moment while trying to make it better.

Good luck this year guys. I wish you all the successes that will lead you to happiness.

I'll check in on you from time to time.

Sean